ANA Newsletter Issue #1

Disclaimer - Paramount owns all characters and starships mentioned in the following document. No infringement of their rights is intended, and I am not receiving money for this.

Warning - After reading through what I've written, I realise I've come across as a right cow <s>. This is not true, and this is purely intended as fun and is not to be taken seriously. You have been warned...

ANA: ANTI-NEELIX ASSOCIATION

Greetings, and welcome to the first Official ANA Newsletter. This newsletter is dedicated to discussions and views about that yellow-skinned, brown-spotted alien. After various comments made by members of the JetC10 mailing list I have decided to start a technologically advanced soap box about the Talaxian that we all love to hate (so cliche - but so true). Before I start however, I must send out a brief apology to Ethan Phillips (the man behind the latex and the fur). I have the utmost respect for Mr Phillips as an actor, and do not want him to feel that this is his fault.

Anyway, on with the Neelix bashing....

Degrading Neelix Quote Number One:

"Dismissed. That's a Starfleet expression for 'get out'." Janeway to Neelix - 'The Cloud'.

Neelix Bashing Moment:

Being dumped by Kes in 'Warlord'. Okay, so she wasn't in control of her actions, but it was extremely satisfying.

Upcoming Eps/Rumours (possible spoilers, but only small ones):

In the fourth season episode 'Mortal Coil' Neelix dies (Woo hoo!), but is brought back to life (Doh!) by Borg technology provided by Seven. This writer wonders if he'll be able to come up with some interesting thoughts on life after this experience, or if he'll only succeed in annoying us for 45 minutes. Although hearing about the ep has brought to mind some possible J/C scenes I hope to see....

In a recent interview, Lolita Fatjo (Script Co-Ordinator) revealed that there would be no major romance between Janeway and Chakotay this season <boo, hiss>. The interviewer asked if Neelix was a possible romantic interest for Janeway as he has now broken up with Kes. This reminded me of the time when I suggested the same thing (jokingly, of course). Worryingly, the interviewer seemed quite serious. I can only pray that he was being sarcastic and I couldn't tell because I was reading the interview and couldn't hear the inflections in his voice (Oooo...inflections. Remind you of anything?).

Oh, and for those of you who are concerned....Lolita Fatjo insisted that there definitely *wasn't* going to be a romantic relationship between Janeway and Neelix. As the great woman once said, "We'll all thank you for that."

*And* she informed us that although there's no J/C romance this season, Chakotay is always lurking around in the background ready to make the kill.  ;-)

Missed Opportunities:

On the subject of 'Tuvix', they should have kept him intact. I preferred him to either Neelix or Tuvok at the time, and he was a great tragic character. Kudos to everyone involved in that ep.

My Reasons For Being A Member Of ANA:

Each week/fortnight/month/whenever I make the new newsletter I will invite you to send your reasons as to why you're a member of ANA. I will only print one persons reason per newsletter, but I promise everyone's will be printed eventually.

He's irritating and he's badly dressed. Okay, so I admit taste in clothing is not a good basis for hating someone, but I don't think I've liked a single outfit of his. Except for the one in 'Tuvix' which was a nice amalgamation of Neelix's and Tuvok's outfits (how lucky that not only did their DNA mesh but so did their clothing. What are the odds?). His relationship with Kes was never very realistic to me. I can understand Kes being greatful to him - he did rescue her from the Kazon after all. But I just can't see Kes being attracted to him. In fact I can't see anyone in any species in *any* quadrant being attracted to him. Also, when we met Kes she was barely one, so how old was she when she met Neelix? Apparently they were already in love when introduced to the crew of Voyager, so I only hope that Ocampa are fully grown adults by the time they are six months old. If not, I'd be seriously worried about the kind of woman <ahem> that he's attracted to.

Why is he irritating? His excessive exuberance for one. Being cheerful is one thing, but Neelix's cheerfulness had reached unreachable heights almost by the end of the pilot.

And don't even get me started on his dancing....

Why I Like Neelix:

This tiny little corner of the newsletter is dedicated to those who like Neelix and think he's a great character. Feel free to send in comments or scenes when you think he's not being irritating.

I have one...

I like him at the end of 'Rise' when he's determined to make Tuvok laugh. He and Tuvok are playfully arguing, and Tuvok just *has* to have the last word...

Neelix Trivia:

Q1) What is the name of Neelix's home planet? (Answer next issue.)

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Well, what did you think? Please send in comments, thoughts, views, questions, answers, quotes, scenes, ideas, recipes for Leola root stew...

ANA Newsletter Editor: Suz

ANA Newsletter Archivist: Heather

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